Rest in Peace Cheap and Battered Wisconsin Driver's License. Yes you are still 6 months shy of your experation date, yes you have been a great conversation piece, yes you have drawn the ire of traffic cops who complain that you're cracked and unreadable, thus diverting attention away from me, yes you have aroused the suspicion of power happy bouncers excited to spot a fake, only to squash their giddiness once I cooly point to your expiration date, yes, cheap and battered Wisconsin Driver's License, you have been a loyal companion since October 15th 1999, the first day we met at the DMV in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. For this I thank you. I am sorry I must move on to a newer, shinier Virginia Driver's License. I will never forget you. You are one of a kind. Please don't think of this as a demotion or an ending but, rather, a well deserved early retirement. I will not forget you and through October 17 of 2007 I will still bring you up at social gatherings and show people that, while battered, you're not expired and, in my heart, you never will be expired. Thanks for the good times.
